Laura, I believe you and respect your opinion. All I can think of is, this is what happens when Buddhist thought and other Eastern philosophies become Westernized or Americanized without an understanding of the culture from which they arose. I feel the same way about the practice of yoga and the Western way of instructing yoga teachers. Just a few hours are spent in trying to summarize thousands of years of knowledge, that was originally meant to be taught by a guru over a period of many years.
(Please understand, I am not in any way dismissing or belittling your experiences).
While reading your words, I had the same thoughts as another responder about menopause. These physical feeling only come up when you meditate, because that is when your brain is quiet enough to sense what is happening in your body (as that is the actual purpose of a body scan). Also, the tingling in certain fingers could be due to pressure on a nerve ending, and different fingers have different nerve endings, so that can explain why the entire hand does not feel affected.
I teach mindful meditation to adults. Meditation is not about emptying the brain of thought, that is a misunderstanding of what Buddhists mean by "empty." I keep my teaching to simple "grounding" practices. I always tell my students that if they start to feel anxiety, it is wise to back off. Dealing with deep issues is not in the realm of a meditation teacher. If a student really wants to look deeply, they may want to do so in the presence of a mental health professional. Western society is more individualistic, Eastern society is more collective, thus Westerners are more likely to misunderstand ego (in the psychiatric sense) and tend to feel "attacked" when delving into their sense of self.
Your Christian tradition is strong, and provides you with comfort. You may find inner work more approachable through the practice of contemplative prayer. Thomas Merton (who was a friend of Thich Nhat Hanh's) wrote an informative book about contemplative prayer: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/113525/contemplative-prayer-by-thomas-merton/
"ABOUT CONTEMPLATIVE PRAYER In this classic text, Thomas Merton offers valuable guidance for prayer. He brings together a wealth of meditative and mystical influences–from John of the Cross to Eastern desert monasticism–to create a spiritual path for today. Most important, he shows how the peace contacted through meditation should not be sought in order to evade the problems of contemporary life, but can instead be directed back out into the world to affect positive change.Contemplative Prayer is one of the most well-known works of spirituality of the last one hundred years, and it is a must-read for all seeking to live a life of purpose in today’s world." http://merton.org/. Peace to you! I've missed you.
